“Give Me Something Nice”

Ten Things I Learned From Reading “Heads in Beds“ A Tell-All Memoir About Working In Elite Hotels

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Photo by Sylvie Tittel on Unsplash

If you don’t tip the bellman who carries your bags to your room, something nasty could wind up on your toothbrush during your stay.

There is always a better room.

People who hang out in hotel lobbies all day are called “lobby lizards.”

Reservations made through Internet discount sites get the worst rooms.

If you want an upgrade, hand over a twenty at check-in and say, “Give me something nice.”

Slang names for a hundred dollar bill include: nugget, money shot, redhead, dirty dancer, hundo, hunnert, brick, left, ben and denny.

Hotel guests often make quirky demands, such as refusing to stay in any room where the digits in the room number didn’t add up to nine.

If you work at a hotel and your employer tries to fire you unjustly, even though you do your job well, the union will protect you.

If your employers try to fire you because you’re a lazy slacker, and do your job abysmally, the union will protect you.

The morbidly obese are excellent tippers.

Have any hotel tips of your own? I invite you to share them in the Comments section.

(If you enjoyed this listicle by Roz Warren, you might like this one too.)

Written by

Writing Coach/Medium Sherpa Roz Warren(https://muckrack.com/roz-warren) (roSwarren@gmail.com) writes for everyone from the New York Times to the Funny Times.

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