I've been there. I threw out the man I loved 4 years ago when i learned that he'd had a secret girlfriend on the side for over a decade. It hurt. I missed the guy I thought he was -- an honest and loving man. But that guy didn't exist. The real Mark was a manipulative liar. I'm here to say that 4 years later, I no longer love him and dont miss him. And what got me here was therapy and the support of my friends/family -- and writing about it! A lot. So pour your heart out. Because it helps.