Remind me never to piss you off. That illustration of your celebrating the arrival of your enemy's head is truly chilling.

I don't need a magic stork because my next door neighbor is my good friend who also owns the BEST FUCKING BAKERY IN PHILADELPHIA.

And she just dropped two pieces of fresh pumpkin pie on my porch.

They are better than anything a stork could ever bring me.

So now it's time to leave Medium and eat pie.

Written by

Writing Coach/Medium Sherpa Roz Warren(https://muckrack.com/roz-warren) (roSwarren@gmail.com) writes for everyone from the New York Times to the Funny Times.

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store