Right on! I loathe self check out and my local grocery store has been slowly forcing all of their customers to use it, by drastically under-staffing the regular check out lanes. I’m too much of a wuss to actually steal from the self check out (and I’m white! So I’m probably not entitled to, right?) but I totally support your pirating ways. If enough pirates steal from enough check out lines, maybe the grocery stores will wise up, get rid of them and actually staff the regular lanes? Or am I just being a foolish optimist? What I’m trying to say here is that this piece is funny as hell and I really enjoyed it.