Somebody ought to start a business doing this for Medium writers if they haven't already.

They send you the draft. You perform this magic. You send them the invoice.

I'd sign up.

I happen to be a writing coach who works with a lot of Medium writers to improve their work. That includes upgrading the title, subtitle and image. I've learned a lot from you here. (And I'm totally bookmarking this article to share with my writers.)